


Can We Stop This For a Minute?

by wordscantexpress



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Girlfriends - Freeform, Oliviana, and did you notice I'm still thinking of a last name for Diana, bye, depressed, first fic in a while, i'm posting this at 2am in the morning what a day to be alive, idk this awkward, implied suicide, omf I hate tagging, slight comic relief
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-25
Updated: 2015-11-25
Packaged: 2018-05-03 07:31:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5282168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordscantexpress/pseuds/wordscantexpress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>You know I can tell that your heart isn't in it, or with it</em>
</p><p>Fear lodged into the crevices of her heart and seeped into her system, her body left a trembling mess. Diana could do nothing but let the scalding tears slide down her warm cheeks as she cried earnestly, all too contrasting to the constant coldness she felt surrounded her.</p><p>  <em>Babe, answer me </em></p><p>(Or: alternatively a rendition to Louis' part in Over Again and to a whole other bunch of 1D songs)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can We Stop This For a Minute?

_You know I can tell that your heart isn't in it, or with it_

Fear lodged into the crevices of her heart and seeped into her system, her body left a trembling mess. Diana could do nothing but let the scalding tears slide down her warm cheeks as she cried earnestly, all too contrasting to the constant coldness she felt surrounded her.

Olivia had sunk into parts of her heart she previously hadn't know existed, making way each day, and at times she felt she might just combust from the feeling, with the way she made her laugh everyday and the way her smile just brightened up her day. She couldn't tell her though. She couldn't find it in herself to tell her about the stomach pains at night, or the occasional throb of her wrist or of the lines that marked her thighs.

_And tell me with your mind, body and spirit_

All accounted, she was the bad one, she was the faulty piece of the puzzle, being jammed into places she didn't quite fit to, broken without repair _\- who wanted a piece of broken plaything anyways?_ \- and so not made for this world, let alone for Olivia Gardens.

_I can make your tears fall down like the showers that are British_

Diana picked herself up from the floor, up from the corner of her room where she swears she's sulked more than a trillion times. She makes a gesture to leave, stalking towards her door, but halts as a the new message tune beeps on her phone.

_Olivia._

Diana picks her cell up and it is her, scanning through the half-dozen messages, shame wrecking through her, doing the opposite of dopamine, filling up her senses with dread, leaving a feeling akin to regret squeezing at her chest, eyes glazing over with irrevocable sadness.

_Diana_

_Babe, answer me_

_Dee, c'mon I'm serious_

_I feel like we have to talk about this and I just can't wait till tomorrow_

_Are you okay? I need to know that at least you're okay_

_Baby, please I need you_

Diana locked her screen, hitting the hold button on her phone. She wants to forget herself for a moment, maybe forever if the wish were granted. She sighs, turning to her drawers and desk, but she stops dead in her tracks as she hears the unmistakeable ringtone of her bloody girlfriend,

_\- you used to call me on my cellphone, late night when you need my love, -_

and she couldn't find it in her to laugh cause', _how appropiate was that tune?_

She honestly didn't know what to do with herself or more like _her sense of self_ , as she slid the phone to her hands, silenting the unwelcomed, yet oddly fitting ring tune she had for her girlfriend.

She hadn't even chosen it. Olivia had taken the phone from her, claiming her phone tune had to be of her _one and only papi_

_"Drake is sick, Dee"_

She had taken a liking to Drake a few weeks prior and it was all she hummed to as she went about her day. One night she had stayed in at O's and they mucked about in her sheets spilling words to one another as if they were the seventh wonders of the world.

(To be fair, it was, - to her it felt _important_ \- every minute, every hour she spent with Olivia. She was so so good to her. It's just - Olivia didn't _love_ her, okay? She wasn't anything special, and she would never be- it's was all so complicated in her head, ideas wrecking together and blinding her.)

Nonetheless, she sighed. Making way to her bathroom, forgoing the idea of choosing her clothes for the night. Her cheeks were streaked with tears and she was just _tired, of life, of herself, of her family, she didn't know,_ she just knew that the want to sleep for a lifetime was ever present, her shoulders slumping forward as she once again turned deaf ear to her girlfriend's calls and texts.

_Whether we're together or apart_

_We can both remove the masks_

_And admit we regret it from the start_

Diana's phone message notifications when off again,

_Fuck Diana, answer me, I know you read these, please, baby you know I love you no matter what,_

_you know that, right?_

_please_

but she never truly had the chance to properly look them over.

**Author's Note:**

> hiiiii Idk how to link but find me like infinity-with-zee @ tumblr.com
> 
> Support me by liking and giving kudos, thanks!! :)


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